How to tell your husband you want to buy the art.
To start off with I want to make one thing clear. The tips here are in no way sneaky or scheming. My wish for you has been and will always be that you have a happy, healthy, home. A haven of good vibes. If your husband has been bullied into an art purchase the art is NOT going to have the desired effect in your home!
But honestly- what is one of the biggest reasons you don’t go ahead and make a purchase- even if it speaks deeply to your heart and values? We could say it’s money but more often than not it’s what your loved ones THINK of how you’re using the money. I saw a great need for this to be discussed. I know from experience that my husband’s opinion will always make or break a purchasing decision.
If I sneakily buy something expensive without him knowing I suffer from a bad case of the guilts. In a healthy partnership many of the purchases should be made with mutual agreement… but in my experience I’ve found that a lot of husbands (but definitely not every one) aren’t all that interested in making home décor decisions. The general answer when a woman asks her man what he thinks of her styling skills is “yeah alright… how much did it cost?”. Or a lot of men just opt for “I’ll leave that stuff up to you- I’m happy if you’re happy”. BUT if all a man can think about when he sees an artwork on the wall is his wife splurging (and not really understanding why) then the space is still not really a happy, calming sanctuary for everyone, is it?
In saying that I have had quite a few lovely men who are loyal customers and take a great interest in purchasing art and supporting local artists. I also know some extremely talented male artists! This blog is to help out women who aren’t feeling confident in knowing how to bring up the discussion about purchasing art so that their whole family can draw inspiration, comfort and joy from the artwork for many years to come.
Here are a few things to help so that you’re both on the same page:
Be truthful. To your husband AND yourself. Do you just want the art to chase after the next big thing- an insta-worthy house or to brag to your visitors? Or do you want to celebrate the work, time and efforts of an artist you admire? Do you respect them and want to support their work? Does the piece evoke special feelings for you? Does it bring back memories, inspire you or speak of your values? Will it be a daily reminder of what’s important to you and your family? Explain this to him and exactly why you’d like the art in your home.
Decide TOGETHER what the most important things are for you and your family and how you’d like to reflect this in your surroundings. What is your family culture? Is it nature and your close connection with the land and animals? Then maybe you want a home that brings the outdoors in. Is it traditions passed down from one generation to the next? Then maybe you want to highlight some special family heirlooms. Is it your faith and values? Maybe you’d like to surround yourself with words that encourage your spiritual journey everyday. Are you happy to buy items that are cheap and made overseas but don’t last very long? Or do you strongly believe in purchasing quality that supports Australian farmers and businesses and local producers and artisans?
Many artists provide a preview page before they sell their original artwork online. If the art is a print or on a product the artist will try to provide you with all the information about it and is often more than happy to speak to you directly about their work. This gives both you and your husband a chance to decide if you BOTH like the artwork, learn about it’s story and process, know if you have the right spot to place it in your home, measure it and know if you can afford it.
Many artists (like me) offer their art in a range of different price points. From large, statement original artworks to special, small originals. From giclée prints (that look just like originals, but more affordable and accessible) to digital printable art. You can have a chat together about what’s important to you and what you can afford. If it’s an option you may even just decide to celebrate your favourite artist by choosing products that display their art in your everyday life (tea towels, stationary, water bottles, phone cases, etc).
When it comes down to it we just need to be mindful and intentional with our purchases. It can be easier said than done! But if we decide together and know what is important to us and what we want to strive towards for our home and family then when the opportunity comes along you will both know whether it is a good choice or not quite the right fit for you.
AND on the plus side- If your husband understands why you make the household decisions you do you’ll be less likely to be constantly boring him with talk about home décor and interior design! He’ll be able to see more clearly that your aim is to create an intentional, loving, nurturing home for your family- not just to spend all of the money!